Friday, December 28th.... the day after the twins were born. WOW, I am hormonal.
Both boys are doing as they should for being born at 32 weeks 6 days. They are in warmer beds and have IV's for nutrition, bandaids for when blood was taken, heart monitors and all kinds of other stuff. They both had a spinal tap done the day they were born and the preliminary results came back good (this was done because my water broke). The nurses and docs have not shown any concern for the boys as of today. They both have gone #1 and #2, so all that is working well. Also... they are graduating to isolates tonight. They both have been feeding through a feeding tube through their mouth. Hopefully soon the tube will be moved to thier nose so they both can suck on a pacifer. I really don't know much more....Brian has been getting alot of the information since I am really tired, sore, hormonal and on edge. The docs and nurses just say they are doing good for thier age.... they are all very cautious about what they say.
As for me, I got off the IV and got the cathider taken out this morning which was great. I still have the epideral in for pain but that will come out tomorrow and I will have pain pills. After I got the IV and cathider out I was able to walk to the level II NICU. This all feels very sureal right now. I have not yet gotten to really bond with the twins and I really don't know how to. I want to spend all day in the NICU but I am tired which makes me so cranky. I am trying to stay positive and know that the boys are getting the best care possible and that they will both be home soon where I know we will bond. I just don't want them to forget my voice. I guess you could say I am jealous that I am not caring for them right now. I am trying to pump and that is getting alittle frustrating too. I know things will get better and I am trying to stay upbeat about it knowing that Brian and I are now parents. It is amazing!!! I will be here till Monday hanging out with the babies and recovering from surgery. Brian and all our family has been amazing and I am so happy they are around and are here to help.
Everything just happened so fast.... its crazy!
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Like mother like daughter
5 years ago
9 comments:
Oh Court, the blues can be really bad. The best advice I got was to just let it happen, don't try to fight the emotions. You know it's hormonal and it is just going to tire you out trying to prevent it. I cried every night for almost a week for no reason. But it made me feel better. :) Those boys will know you from everyone else who cares for them b/c you are their mama and no one can replace you! Hang in there! I'll be praying for you! I'm so glad you finally got to hold them! It's kind of like getting a part of you that has been missing back isn't it?
Raw emotion! You and they will be fine - I just know it!
Oh Court, I can only imagine how difficult this must be! Hang in there, I am praying for you! There is no way those boys can forget the voice of the woman who carried them for nearly 33 weeks, it's just not possible. :)
Courtney! You did it! Your babies are precious! I'm so proud of you!
Those boys won't forget you - there is always a special bond between moms and boys. And don't worry about being hormonal - everyone is hormonal - you deserve to be hormonal!
Can't wait to see you and them in person! Love and miss you!
LMS
When I would go see Elena in NICU I always lowered my gown (right at the neck) just a bit so she could smell me while I held her. I would rub my arm on her skin so the scent would stay with her. It is going to be hard, but I've been there and each day will be different - either up or down. The thing is, now is the time for you to rest. Sleep if you can, heal and be ready for when they do come home.
And about bonding, it will happen. There were days I would stare at my babies and think what the...? And then one day I was head over heels...
I love you girl. Cry, sleep, eat and love on them.
Hey Court!
Love you, and praying for you. And I know exactly what you are going through. Yes, even I was hormonal. I was in the hospital for 10 days, and Corinne got to go home before me, so I was a basket case when she went home. I felt like you, but when I came home, and held her again, and spoke to her, she looked at me and recognized my voice, and I knew she knew who I was and hadn't forgotten me. Trust me, those boys won't forget who you are.
Hang in there! Things will get better!
You looked so great today! Hang in there - and if it makes you feel any better...I am totally hormonal - and I had a child 16 years ago! LOL
Hey Court,
Those babies will never forget your voice! They know you better than anyone and when you finally get to care for them it will be sweet. You are blessed!
M
Oh how precious they are Courtney! I am so glad to learn that the boys are here and that everyone is well! I will pray for you and your family as you go through various transitions. Girl you're gonna be a great mom! So happy for you!
--Sarah W.
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