The Synnott Twins

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Monday, July 28, 2008

Feeling Guilty

I have had some thoughts in the back of my mind the last few days and I need to see what you all think about it. I feel like I am not doing everything I can to give the boys a full and eventful life... yes I know they are only seven months old but still it is how I feel. Most days we take one outing which is to go shopping then we spend most of the time inside our house with just the three of us and sometimes a grandparent. The eat, sleep and play... most of the time sitting and playing with the same toys or in their excer-saucers day after day. It just seems like a dull life and I am not doing everything I can to mature their minds and physical skill. Am I nuts? We go to little gym once a week which I love but that is it. We don't go to play groups mostly because I am scared. Scared because it is right around their feeding time and it is so hard to feed them if they are distracted and they would be with so many kids and moms around. I just don't know if I could personally handle it. But why am I being selfish and holding them back from being around other little ones? They need interaction right? I just want my kids to not be be shy and want to have friends when they get alittle older. I want to instill in them a sense of wonder and eagerness and to be friendly. I just think I am keeping my kids from their full potential by keeping them in their excer-saucers and not being around others. I know I am just being dumb but I needed to get it off my chest and make sure everyone else felt this way when their children started to play more and interact more. ok..ok..ok.. I'm done! :-)

6 comments:

Adam & Andrew said...

The day we had our first playgroup date was a big turning point for us and my guys were still pretty little. Spending time with other moms and babies was not only great for the boys but wonderful for me. We shared tips and moral support.

Find something small maybe through your local twin moms group. Your boys will be more flexible than you think,in fact I think it's great for them to learn to adapt their schedule from time to time. It won't hurt anything to try!

Another idea is to attend a baby storytime at your local library. We love this!

Getting out of the house is good for everyone!

Harris Boys said...

I don't think you are being dumb at all. as moms we all think we're not doing enough for our children. at 7 m/o my boys were doing pretty much the same thing as your kiddos. I called it the baby circuit. we went from the play mate to the excer-saucers to the bouncy seat, etc. we never did the little gym ( I was too scared to do that alone ). I did gtg at least 2 times a week with other moms...what an outlet that was for me. I kept that trend up for 17 months until I started back to work. Its a good way to get your kids around other kids and have some adult time too.

don't beat yourself up, your doing the very best you can. Its hard with 2 babies..esp. when you start to think about taking them out alone. Its hard, but your doing a GREAT job :)

xoxoxo

Jenny B said...

ok, I only have one, so I won't give you any advice about getting out aside from I know that it will do you all a world of good, when you are all ready to do it. Playgroups will come when you are ready. I was terrified when I started ours, and I just knew that she would be overwhelmed by it, but she LOVED it and it is by far the best thing that I could have ever done. :) Find one that you are comfortable with and things will work themselves out as far as the scheduling. I agree with Adam and Andrew's mom, they will be more flexible than you think. :)

As for the are you doing enough for them to help them develop. Think about how much they look at the simplest thing. They will stare at a light forever and things that rattle and things that turn. Their brain funtion is at it's peek right now and so everything makes them learn. From you talking to them, to them talking to each other, to how the carpet feels, etc. It seems boring to us, but to them it is the most amazing thing in the world. I know for Ansley that she was very overwhelmed by too many new things in one week. So I don't think that you have to worry about doing something constantly, even though it seems like you are doing the same thing everyday you are teaching them something new everday also. When they are toddlers, they will want to go out and run around more themselves. I went through the same thing, like I should always be doing something more for her. :) I think you are doing great!

KELLY said...

Go down the street and see Kathy (and Chloe).....you silly girl! :)
I can even come over one day and go down there with you - and do all the intros, if you want! You will absolutely LOVE her...and she can help you with the boys, too!

Ashhog said...

I have totally felt that way too. But give yourself a break-you are doing everything possible with them at this age. And like the others say-EVERYTHING makes them learn right now.

We do storytime at the library but haven't done any playgroups or gyms or anything. We actually took them outside and filled up a bucket of water and sat them beside it (watching them of course) and put the hose on the ground and they had so much fun studying the water coming out of the hose and putting their hands in the bucket. I really think that sometimes it's just the simple things that teach them the most.

Harris Boys said...

great advice courtney...I gave you an award on my blog, go check it out :)